There are very few FTLien rappers who move and shake as much as Bleubird and Protoman, so when the two combined forces last year for the uptempo 954 anthem “Guns Don’t Kill People (Florida Does),” it wasn’t hard to imagine that it’d end up in the hands of some music-industry higher-ups. What nobody could have foreseen was the bizarre coincidence from which sprang this very soap operatic rap controversy.

After finding its way to the desk of a major-label A&R (whose identity will remain undisclosed at this time), an almost instantaneous response was received in the form of an email titled “REJECTED,” the contents of which were very concise. “Fuck this song. Fuck these guys. This dude fucked my girlfriend. These assholes are UNSIGNABLE.”

Following some quick sleuthing, Bleubird was able to substantiate the seemingly wild claim that, yes, he had in fact had relations with this A&R’s girlfriend. And although it was prior to her current relationship, she was still a huge fan and often spoke fondly of him — apparently in too great of detail. Not being ones to pass on an opportunity to address what basically amounts to a threat of industry blackballing, Bleubird and Protoman immediately returned to the studio to record a follow-up collab titled “UNSIGNABLE.”

While Bird gets down and dirty airing out the lusty details of this 90210-ish beef in hilariously exaggerated fashion, Proto takes feverish retribution upon the score of sleazy industry types he’s encountered throughout his rap life. Those who gave him shit for being too “hip-hop” and as such not being “marketable” enough. Still proud of the uncompromising stance he took toward major labels early in his career but perhaps feeling the sting of economic hardship in the present-day music biz, Proto jokes of bridges burnt and opportunities passed on with lines like, “Real hip-hop and I don’t care if I’m broke/I kept it real, motherfucker — goddamn it, I’m broke.”

Download “UNSIGNABLE” and acquaint yourself with this awesome drama in full detail, but beware: It won’t do a thing for your career.

[written by:Jasper Delaini for County Grind/New Times]
[photo by Digital Cypher Photography]

Protoman & Bleubird – Unsignable by Protoman

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